PART 1 - Revised Statutes of Missouri Which Govern County Commissions

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Blogger; Aspiring Photo-Journalist; and Missouri Tiger Fan

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,257

This is PART 1 of a 2 PART report which will address the "legality" of certain actions and decisions taken by the Gasconade County Commission in relationship to the so-called "salary overpayment lawsuit".

County governments in the State of Missouri are subject to the Revised Statutes of Missoui.  Chapter 49 of the Revised Statutes of Missouri (RSMo 49) and Chapter 50 of the Revised Statutes of Missouri (RSMo 50) are of particular interest in that they pertain to the operating procedures, rules, powers, reponsibilities and limitations of County Commissions.  RSMo 49 pertains to County Commissions and County Buildings while RSMo 50 pertains to County Finances, Budget and Retirement Systems.

Some of the particular sections of these chapters which we will be referring to in PART 2 of this invstigative report are copied/pasted hereinbelow:

49.070 - A majority of the commissioners of the county commission shall constitute a quorum to do business; a single member may adjourn from day to day, and require the attendance of those absent; when but two commissioners are sitting and they shall disagree in any matter submitted to them, the decision of the presiding commissioner shall stand as the decision of the commission; provided further, when the presiding commissioner is absent and the other two commissioners are present the commission clerk shall designate one of the commissioners present as presiding commissioner during the absence of the regular presiding commissioner, and he shall, during the absence of the regular presiding commissioner, have all of the powers of the regular presiding commissioner.

49.220 - If a majority of the commissioners of the county commission shall be interested in any cause or proceeding pending before them, or related to either party, the same shall be certified with the original papers to the circuit court of the county, which shall proceed thereon to final judgment and determination in like manner as the county commission should have done.

49.230 - Appeals from the decisions, findings and orders of county commissions shall be conducted under the provisions of chapter 536.

50.160 - The county commission may:

1. Audit, adjust and settle all accounts to which the county is a party;
2. Order the payment out of the county treasury of any sum of money found to be due by the county on such accounts;
3. Enforce the collection of money due the county;
4. Order suit to be brought on the bond of any delinquent and require the prosecuting attorney for the county to commence and prosecute the same;
5. Issue all necessary process to secure the attendance of any person, whether party or witness, whom it deems necessary to examine in the investigation of any accounts;
6. In order to procure the exhibition or delivery to it of any accounts, books, documents or other papers, it may issue process directed to the person in whose custody or care the accounts, books, documents or other papers may be, commanding him to deliver or transmit the same to such commission, which process shall be served by the sheriff;
7. Examine all parties and witnesses on oath, touching the investigation of any accounts, and if any person being served with such process shall not appear according to the command thereof, without reasonable cause, or if any person in attendance at any hearing or proceeding shall, without reasonable cause, refuse to be sworn or to be examined, or to answer a question or to produce a book or paper, or to subscribe or swear to his deposition, he shall be deemed guilty of a misdemeanor;
8. If it finds it necessary to do so, it may employ an accountant to audit the accounts of the various county officers.

Please carefully read and study the above sections of Missouri statutes in preparation for reading PART 2 which we intend to post in the next day or two.  Please refer back to these statutes as needed.

Just one more thing ....  As a Hermann Hearsay reader, you are obviously a very bright person.  Consequently it is very likely that you already anticipate where I am going with this report.  Please don't spoil it for any readers who may not be as sharp as you by making a comment in PART 1.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Late Night Mood Music - Tuesday night, 12/7/2010

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Blogger; Aspiring Photo-Journalist; and Missouri Tiger Fan

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,256

Andy Williams has always been one of my favorite pop singers.  Here is the blue-eyed, silver-throated Andy Williams singing "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.dschaefer.vemma.com/ (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.heart2heartlyrics.blogspot.com/ (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.hermannmonews.blogspot.com/ (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.rivertownrecipes.blogspot.com/ (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.hermannadvertisercourier.com/ (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.time4pie.com/ (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Editorial Comment: "Give us your tired, your bullied, bloodied and browbeaten, Your huddled masses yearning to express viewpoints freely"

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,255

Apparently we have once again "hit a nerve"!  Yesterday's "Quote Of The Day" posting mocked Hank Vonk's 12/6 "Letter to the Editor" over at online "news" website CNL.  We received a number of comments from disaffected CNL subscribers who are tired of being "relentlessly bullied" by the "Hanksta" aka "The Bully From The South". 

One of our own staff members, himself a past CNL reader and commenter, can relate to this.  Dick Schaefer, one of our contributing writers and investigative bloggers, often had trouble getting his comments posted by the publisher of CNL.  He butted heads with publisher Jeff Noedel on numerous occasions.  Schaefer can relate to those who have experienced the "relentless brow-beating and bullying" of Hank Vonk aka Luckyrider when he was able to get his "unpopular" viewpoints published as comments on CNL.

And now we see that others are openly complaining about Hank Vonk and CNL.  For your convenience, you may click on this link to go back and re-read yesterday's "Quote Of The Day" along with comments from our readers:  http://hermannhearsay.blogspot.com/2010/12/quote-of-day-monday-1262010.html.

To all disaffected, unappreciated, disrespected, over-charged, browbeaten CNL paid subscribers, Hermann Hearsay makes this open invitation to all of you:

"Give us your tired, your bullied, bloodied and browbeaten,

Your huddled masses yearning to express viewpoints freely,

The wretched refuse of your over-priced "news" website.

Send these, your disrespected and unappreciated, to us;

We lift our lamps beside the open door of FREE speech!"

Hermann Hearsay ..... a friendly site for  FREE thinkers, FREE subscriptions and FREE speech!

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Riddle Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,254

What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?

(For Answer, see Comment Section.)

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Song Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,253

Here's Willie Nelson singing "Pretty Paper" ....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Photo Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,252

Hermann Eagle Hall and Sharp Corner Tavern
Market Street
Hermann, MO
11/10/2010

Photo by Dick Schaefer (Hermann Hearsay).
Copyright protected.  All rights reserved.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Laugh Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,251

"Anderson Cooper did a show this week from inside that half-mile long drug smuggling tunnel between San Diego and Mexico. It's quite an amazing tunnel. It has lighting, ventilation, a rail car, a Starbucks..."  ~ Jimmy Kimmel (12/1/2010)

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Quote Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,250

Sixty-nine years ago on this date (December 7th), America was attacked at Pearl Harbor Naval Base, Hawaii by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan.  Over 2,400 Americans lost their lives in the sneak attack.  The very next day (December 8th), President Franklin Delano Roosevelt addressed a joint session of the United States Congress.  His speech that day will be forever remembered and recounted. 

Here is the full authenticated text of President Roosevelt's speech on that day:

Mr. Vice President, Mr. Speaker, Members of the Senate, and of the House of Representatives:

Yesterday, December 7th, 1941 -- a date which will live in infamy -- the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan.

The United States was at peace with that nation and, at the solicitation of Japan, was still in conversation with its government and its emperor looking toward the maintenance of peace in the Pacific.

Indeed, one hour after Japanese air squadrons had commenced bombing in the American island of Oahu, the Japanese ambassador to the United States and his colleague delivered to our Secretary of State a formal reply to a recent American message. And while this reply stated that it seemed useless to continue the existing diplomatic negotiations, it contained no threat or hint of war or of armed attack.

It will be recorded that the distance of Hawaii from Japan makes it obvious that the attack was deliberately planned many days or even weeks ago. During the intervening time, the Japanese government has deliberately sought to deceive the United States by false statements and expressions of hope for continued peace.

The attack yesterday on the Hawaiian islands has caused severe damage to American naval and military forces. I regret to tell you that very many American lives have been lost. In addition, American ships have been reported torpedoed on the high seas between San Francisco and Honolulu.

Yesterday, the Japanese government also launched an attack against Malaya.

Last night, Japanese forces attacked Hong Kong.

Last night, Japanese forces attacked Guam.

Last night, Japanese forces attacked the Philippine Islands.

Last night, the Japanese attacked Wake Island.

And this morning, the Japanese attacked Midway Island.

Japan has, therefore, undertaken a surprise offensive extending throughout the Pacific area. The facts of yesterday and today speak for themselves. The people of the United States have already formed their opinions and well understand the implications to the very life and safety of our nation.

As commander in chief of the Army and Navy, I have directed that all measures be taken for our defense. But always will our whole nation remember the character of the onslaught against us.

No matter how long it may take us to overcome this premeditated invasion, the American people in their righteous might will win through to absolute victory.

I believe that I interpret the will of the Congress and of the people when I assert that we will not only defend ourselves to the uttermost, but will make it very certain that this form of treachery shall never again endanger us.

Hostilities exist. There is no blinking at the fact that our people, our territory, and our interests are in grave danger.

With confidence in our armed forces, with the unbounding determination of our people, we will gain the inevitable triumph -- so help us God.

I ask that the Congress declare that since the unprovoked and dastardly attack by Japan on Sunday, December 7th, 1941, a state of war has existed between the United States and the Japanese empire.




Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Bible Verse Of The Day - Tuesday, 12/7/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,249

My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water. – Jeremiah 2:13

This passage in Jeremiah mirrors the story in the Garden of Eden. Once again, mankind doesn’t want the tree of life, but they wanted their own version of the knowledge of good and evil with disastrous results. The first sin of forsaking the Lord means that we have to create an alternate solution for our needs. So we create our own cisterns to hold water, but our own creations can create new complexities. Do you feel that your life is too complex? Ask the Lord about this in prayer. Don’t be surprised if you find some self-made solutions that need to be dismantled in order to come back to the living water.

Today’s commentary by Dave Whitehead, Senior Pastor, GraceNYC.org

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Letter To The Editor - Richard Smoker speaks out regarding recent decisions and actions by Presiding Commissioner Ron Jost

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Date:  12/7/2010
Post:  1,248

Hermann Hearsay received an email from Richard Smoker of Hermann late on Monday night.  Smoker is a regular reader and commenter.

Publisher's Notice/Full Disclosure:  Mr. Richard Smoker has been a long-time FREE subscriber to Hermann Hearsay.  Mr. Smoker has no beneficial ownership stake in Hermann Hearsay. Furthermore, Mr. Smoker has no current or past employment relationship with Hermann Hearsay. And in addition to all of the foregoing disclosures, be advised that Mr. Smoker is not related in anyway to any member of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management or staff. And if these disclosures in and of themselves were not enough, it should also be noted that Mr. Smoker has never purchased a lunch or an intoxicating adult beverage for any member of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management, or staff.  In other words, we here at Hermann Hearsay barely know Mr. Smoker. It must be plainly understood that Mr. Smoker speaks entirely for himself in his "Letter to the Letter".

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in Hermann Hearsay "Letters to the Editor" and/or Hermann Hearsay forums or other reader comments are not necessarily those of the ownership, management and/or staff of HermannHearsay.blogspot.com.  We publish this particular "Letter to the Editor" knowing full well that some of our readers will disagree with the content of the letter.  Opposing viewpoints are welcomed and encouraged.

That said, here is Mr. Smoker's letter .....

Dear Mr. Oldsun,

I want to formally express my sincere personal gratitude for the service you provide as Editor of Hermann Hearsay.  I feel you work hard to serve your readers, and you have always been willing to publish letters from your readers as well as their daily comments.

During the course of the past several weeks, I have discussed with you my concerns about the way Presiding Commissioner Ron Jost has handled the shameless requests (demands) by current Southern District Associate Commissioner Jerry Laimore and former Northern District Associate Commissioner Max Aubuchon for the county to reimburse legal expenses which they incurred as a consequence of defending themselves in the so-called "salary overpayment" lawsuit.

To reiterate my concerns and considered viewpoints for the benefit of your readers .....

1. Presiding Commissioner Jost has decided to reimburse the attorney fees and legal expenses which Messrs. Lairmore and Aubuchon have submitted. I understand that the sum total which Jost intends to reimburse Lairmore and Aubuchon is in excess of $52,000. I have no idea whether these bills have been closely audited, authenticated or verified in any way.  I just know that this is sum total of their requests.
2. The county can ill afford to pay out this amount of money for attorney fees and legal expenses which these two individuals incurred because of their stubborn and arrogant refusal to return back to the county "salary overpayments" which were made to them and subsequently deemed "unconstitutional" by the Missouri Supreme Court.  My understanding is that they were asked to make partial repayment when the mistake was first discovered and that they refused to do so.
3. Former Associate Circuit Judge Cynthia Eckelcamp issued her final ruling and court order on the "salary overpayment" case after her initial ruling was reversed by the Missouri Eastern District Court of Appeals on a legal technicality as opposed to the merits of the case. The legal technicality was that the "statute of limitations" had been exceeded. It is my understanding that, in her final ruling, Judge Eckelkamp ordered that all parties pay their own legal expenses, court costs and attorney fees. She did not provide for any provision that these expenses might be reimbursed to Lairmore and Aubuchon by Gasconade County or by Santa Claus.
4. In authorizing the payment of these legal bills, Presiding Commissioner Jost acted unilaterally, and I believe in direct violation of RSMo 49.220. There was no 2/3 majority vote by the County Commission to authorize such payment as is normally required by Missouri statute. Commissioner Lairmore was forced to abstain from the vote, because he obviously has a materially and beneficial interest in the outcome of the vote. Commissioner Matt Penning also abstained from the vote on advice of his attorney, presumably for the reason that he also had an interest in the "salary overpayment' lawsuit, being one of the listed plaintiffs in the original complaint against Messrs. Lairmore and Aubuchon.
5. During this past week's County Commission Meeting which was held at the Owensville City Hall on 12/2/2010, Presiding Commissioner Jost signed reimbursement checks for a portion of the legal bills presented to him by Messrs. Lairmore and Aubuchon. In this meeting, Commissioner Penning again appropriately went on record as "abstaining" from the vote to authorize payment of the legal bills. In response, Presiding Commissioner Jost stated that he was authorizing the payments entirely on his own and that he was signing the checks to Messrs. Lairmore and Aubuchon. Presiding Commissioner Jost cited RSMo 49.070 as his legal authority to act on his own in making the payments. I have read this statute, and I have discussed it with other people. None of us believe that this statute applies in this situation. We believe that Presiding Commissioner Jost has acted unilaterally and without proper legal authority. Whoever advised Jost in this matter, and I believe it was Attorney Ivan Schraeder of Camdenton, is either incompetent or incapable of objective impartiality. Furthermore, it is not clear to me that Mr. Schraeder's legal services were properly engaged by the County Commission. My understanding is that you Commissioner Penning did not participate in a vote on this matter during an open and public meeting of the County Commission. Therefore, I believe that Schraeder's services have been illegally contracted for by Gasconade County. I should think this would be a point of great concern for the Prosecuting Attorney of Gasconade County.
6. By and through her direct involvement in preparing the county checks for the Presiding Commissioner's signature and subsequently transmitting said county checks to Lairmore and Aubuchon, I believe that County Clerk Lesa Lietzow may now also be complicit in this illegal act of issuing and transmitting payment from county funds to Messrs. Lairmore and Aubuchon without a proper and legal vote of authorization by the County Commission. Again, I refer you to RSMo 49.220.

Jimmy, it is possible I may have missed some important material point(s) regarding this matter which we have discussed several times during the course of the past two weeks. Hopefully I have been able to summarize it all in a way which is understandable to you and your readers. If you feel I need to clarify something, don't hesitate to request that I do so.

I shudder to think where this situation may lead.  The Presiding Commissioner has acted hastily and without proper legal authority to make payments to his buddies.  This MUST NOT and WILL NOT be allowed to stand!

Respectfully,

Richard Smoker
Hermann, MO



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Late Night Mood Music - Monday night, 12/6/2010

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Blogger; Aspiring Photo-Journalist; and Missouri Tiger Fan

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,247

Here is Elvis singing "Blue Christmas" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Riddle Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,246

Question:  Why does Santa have 3 gardens?

(For Answer, see Comment Section.)

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Song Of The Day - Monday, 12/5/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1.245

Mariah Carey's rendition of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Photo Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,244

Battocletti's Bake Shoppe
Market Street
Hermann, MO
11/10/2010

Photo by Dick Schaefer (Hermann Hearsay).
Copyright protected.  All rights reserved.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Laugh Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,243

For the "dullards" lurking amongst our readership who haven't understood  ..... er uh that would be you "Jeffy Pooh", "Hanksta" and "Madman" ..... the previous posting (i.e. Post # 1,242) constitutes our "Laugh Of The Day". 

Let me help you out, "Jeffy Pooh", "Hanksta" and "Madman".  There are many TYPES of HUMOR.  Copied and pasted hereinbelow is a complete list of all the various TYPES of HUMOR.  Which type or types of HUMOR have we employed in Post # 1,242?  See if you can guess!

Different Types of Verbal & Written Humor

Adviser:  the comic adviser gives uncalled for advice in a Punch prototype. Ex: Advice to people who want to buy a puppy: Don't.

Anecdotes:  any interesting event, either having to do with a celebrity or something smaller, that helps the humorist make a point. Anecdotes are great for the speaker and writer.

Aside:  a thought added as if something the speaker was saying reminded him of it.

Banter:  good-natured teasing back and forth; exchange of witty remarks.

Blendword:  blending two or three words to make a new word. Ex: smog for smoke and fog.

Blue Humor:  not appropriate for the public speaker. Humor based on easily offensive subjects like making love, body parts, and bodily functions.

Blunder:  wit based on a person who makes a mistake, which makes them appear foolish.

Bull:  a humorous statement that is based on an outrageous contradiction. Ex: "The best people have never had kids."

Burlesque:  a form of satire. Burlesque ridicules any basic style of speech or writing. (Parody makes fun of specific writings.)

Caricature:  exaggeration of a person’s mental, physical, or personality traits, in wisecrack form.

Catch Tale:  a funny story that messes up the reader or listener by implying an awful ending but then stopping with a small declaration.

Conundrum:  a word puzzle that can’t be solved because the answer is a pun. Ex: why do cows wear bells? Their horns don’t work.

Epigram:  clever, short saying about a general group. Mostly satire about mankind. Two types, wordplay and thought play.

Exaggerism:  an exaggerated witticism that overstates the features, defects, or the strangeness of someone or something.

Freudian Slip:  a funny statement which seems to just pop out, but which actually comes from the person’s subconscious thoughts.

Hyperbole:  extreme exaggeration.

Irony:  a leading part of humor. Irony is using words to express something completely different from the literal meaning. Usually, someone says the opposite of what they mean and the listener believes the opposite of what they said.
Joke:  short story ending with a funny climactic twist.

Nonsensism:  inclusive of the epigram and the wisecrack, it is any kind of funny nonsense in speaking form. Nonsensism includes all kinds of absurdity without realistic logic and makes a general observation of absurd reference.

Parody:  humorous version of any well-known writing. Ex: Weird Al Yankovic’s "Pretty Fly for a Rabbi".

Practical Joke:  a joke put into action. You hear an oral joke, sees a printed joke, and feel the practical joke. The trick is played on another person and the humor comes from what happens.

Recovery:  a combination of blunder and wit, where a person makes an error, and then saves himself with a fast correction.

Repartee:  includes clever replies and retorts. The most common form is the insult.

Satire:  wit that is critical humor. Satire is sarcasm that makes fun of something.

Situational Humor:  this is comedy that comes from your own life. No one in your audience will have heard it and it can get a group used to you. This type of humor is based on a humorous situation that you have experienced.

Switching:  a common form of switching is changing the main parts of the story, such as the setup or the punch line, and creating a new joke.

Understatement:  making something that is regular or large seem extremely smaller or less. Intentionally down- sizing a large object.

Wisecrack:  any clever remark about a particular person or thing. Wisecracks are quick wordplays about a person.

Wit:  humor, irony, sarcasm, satire, repartee. Wit is funny because of the sudden sharpness and quick perception. Wit can bite. Verbal wit is a type of humor known as Wordplay.

* References:  L. Audrieth, Anthony "The Art of Using Humor in Public Speaking" 1998.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Letter To The Editor - Yosemite Sam Rips Into Daffy Duck

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1.242

A letter was received today from Yosemite Sam, one of our loyal FREE subscribers.  As a preamble to this particularly angry letter, Hermann Hearsay is posting the following Notice, Disclosure and Disclaimer:

Publisher's Notice/Full Disclosure:  Mr. Yosemite Sam has been a long-time FREE subscriber to Hermann Hearsay.  Mr. Daffy Duck, whom Yosemite Sam viciously criticizes, is also a FREE subscriber to Hermann Hearsay, albeit for a much shorter period of time.  Neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck have any ownership interest in Hermann Hearsay.  Furthermore, neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck have any current or past employment relationship with Hermann Hearsay.  And in addition to all of the foregoing disclosures, be advised that neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck are related in anyway to any members of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management or staff.  And if these disclosures were not enough, it should also be noted that neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck has ever purchased a lunch or an intoxicating adult beverage for any member of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management, or staff.  In other words, we here at Hermann Hearsay barely know these two characters.  It must be plainly understood that Yosemite Sam speaks entirely for himself in his "Letter to the Letter"

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in Hermann Hearsay "Letters to the Editor" and/or Hermann Hearsay forums or other reader comments are not necessarily those of the ownership, management and/or staff of HermannHearsay.blogspot.com.  However, we do have complete control over what we choose to publish.  Sometimes it is helpful in growing our readershop to publish sensational, salacious and scandalous articles and reports.  We cannot be held legally responsible for our editorial standards regardless of how low and sleazy they may be.  Our readers like to read this trash, so we publish it!

Posted hereinbelow is Yosemite Sam's letter.  BE WARNED, IT IS VERY GRAPHIC!

Dear Jimmy,

This letter is to inform you that you have an A-hole amidst your FREE subscriber membership base.  His name is Daffy Duck.  This damned duck is no good!  He has never been any good!  Just ask other Hermannites!  They will tell you that he is a dad-blamed, stinkin' varmint!

Daffy Duck

Be advised that this no-good-for-nothin', dirty, dastardly duck has done the following despicable things:

1. He has dishonored and knocked up my young niece!
2. He has crapped all over #2, #4 and #5 putting greens over at the Loutre Shore Country Club just before my foursome played through.
3. He has passed a bad check to me when he bought a shotgun at my garage sale last year.
4. He got drunk down at the Barrel Bar a few weekends ago and did the Duck Dance on their bar.
5. He shed his filthy dirty black feathers all over my wife's full-length white fox fur coat at our company's Christmas party this year.

This dirty, dastardly duck is a real dickhead!  Please be advised that it would be wise to cancel his FREE subscription and publish a public service announcement advising all your readers to avoid having anything to do with the bastard!

Yosemite Sam

Yours truly,

Yosemite Sam
Hermann, MO

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Anatomy of a Good News Story

Published by Clark Kant, Contributing Writer and Investigative Blogger

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,240

Have you ever read a "news" story and found yourself asking questions that the "news" story failed to answer?  Yep, me too!

Every good "news" story should answer the following basic questions?

WHO?
DID WHAT?
WHEN?
WHERE?
WHEN?
HOW?
TO WHAT EXTENT?
WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OR IMPLICATIONS?
WHY SHOULD I, THE READER, CARE?

Any first year J-School student at Mizzou can recite this list, probably more completely than I have reproduced it here.

Why is it then that we see so many "news" stories written by so-called "news" reporters which fail to answer all these basic questions?

Perhaps the answer to this query may be found among the following reasons:

1. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher is an imposter who was never fully trained or educated in the proper conduct of his craft.  He merely masquerades as a "news" reporter.
2. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher values speed in publishing the story over accuracy and thoroughness of the story.  Rather than get the story right, he seeks to get the story out as fast as he can!  I've actually seen some "news" stories where the publisher "brags" about how many minutes it took between first hearing about the story and publishing the story.  When did good journalism become such a race to get the story (any story) out to the public at the risk of failing to get a complete story out to the public?
3. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher values marketing, promotion and advertising more than he values accurate and professional "news" reporting.  His so-called "news" publication is really just a cheap advertising publication.  Self-promotion and the building of readership become the important objectives as opposed to publishing worthwhile, professionally written "news" stories.  Salacious and scandalous pieces attract readers and are easier to write than hard-hitting, time-consuming investigative reports on matters of true public interest.  The publication is so focused upon self-promotion and generation of advertising revenues that it ceases to be a quality "news" publication.

Your thoughts?

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Quote Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,240

Referring to Northern District Associate Commissioner Matt Penning and all of his supporters, so-called "The Posse", Hank Vonk angrily speaks out in a "Letter to the Editor" of CNL, a local online "news" website ..... 

"We're sick of ALL of you!!!"  ~ Hank Vonk, Owensville, MO (In 'Letter to the Editor' written 12/5/2010 and published by CNL on 12/6/2010)

Note from Hermann Hearsay:  The full context of Hank Vonk's angry "Letter to the Editor" was published by Jeff Noedel, CNL Publisher.  This letter was not "hidden" for viewing by PAID subscribers only, as are so many of Noedel's "news stories".  Furthermore, a lengthy disclaimer accompanies Hank Vonk's "Letter to the Letter".  While Noedel, as publisher, had every opportunity to censor or refrain from publishing the letter or alternatively "hide" it from the general public, he has chosen not to do so.  Instead he asks us to believe that he and CNL have no editorial or collateral interest in the libelous letter which he has published.  If you'd like to view the entire content of the letter, click on this link:  http://countynewslive.com/content/2010/dec/06/letter-editor-hank-vonk-owenvsille-mo

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Bible Verse Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,239

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: – Ecclesiastes 3:1

We are a driven culture. It seems that we want to achieve everything by yesterday! Some people may say that this is a good thing, but it seems we are perpetually tired and lack the margin to enjoy life. Solomon shows us that this is not unique to our culture. To understand the season that we are in can help us say no to many good things that are not appropriate at that particular time. May God give us the wisdom of Solomon, who knew how to focus on the right things in the right season.

Today’s commentary by Dave Whitehead, Senior Pastor, GraceNYC.org

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Late Night Mood Music - Sunday night, 12/5/2010

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Blogger; Aspiring Photo-Journalist; and Missouri Tiger Fan

Date:  12/5/2010
Post:  1,238

"I'll Be Home For Christmas" by Kenny G .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)