Hermann Hearsay tries to keep its operating costs at a bare minimum. We pay our staff the lowest salaries we can get by with. We don't provide them a benefit package or country club membership. We don't provide our staff of crack reporters a comfy office in which to work. We make them get right out there in the community where the actions is and file their reports via the internet or by telephone. We don't even reimburse the travel expenses of our reporters. And up until now, we haven't even provided them business cards.
Well, times are changing! We find ourselves under intense competition from Hermann News (formerly Hermann Muenster), Gasconade County Soapbox, the brand new County News Live website, not to mention the two great newspapers of record in Gasconade County, the Hermann Advertiser-Courier and the Gasconade County Republican. Because of this competitive business environment, our owner and founder, Truman T. Tiger, has authorized me to purchase some cheap business cards for myself, Jimmy Oldsun and Lois Lame.
I wanted to get your input on the design of the our business card before I rush out there and place an order for 500 cards. Please tell me what you think of the business card copy presented below. Please be brutally honest.
****Proposed business card copy****
Hermann Hearsay
FREE ..... FUNNY ..... FLIPPANT ..... FARCICAL
News, news analysis, opinion editorials, local man-on-the-street interviews, unsubstantiated
coffee shop rumors and hearsay ..... basically all the stuff you really want or need!
News, news analysis, opinion editorials, local man-on-the-street interviews, unsubstantiated
coffee shop rumors and hearsay ..... basically all the stuff you really want or need!
The latest rumors, one-sided reports and hearsay ... straight from the horse's mouth!
Clark Kant
Editor In Chief
