Monday, December 6, 2010

Late Night Mood Music - Monday night, 12/6/2010

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Blogger; Aspiring Photo-Journalist; and Missouri Tiger Fan

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,247

Here is Elvis singing "Blue Christmas" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Riddle Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,246

Question:  Why does Santa have 3 gardens?

(For Answer, see Comment Section.)

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Song Of The Day - Monday, 12/5/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1.245

Mariah Carey's rendition of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Photo Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,244

Battocletti's Bake Shoppe
Market Street
Hermann, MO
11/10/2010

Photo by Dick Schaefer (Hermann Hearsay).
Copyright protected.  All rights reserved.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Laugh Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,243

For the "dullards" lurking amongst our readership who haven't understood  ..... er uh that would be you "Jeffy Pooh", "Hanksta" and "Madman" ..... the previous posting (i.e. Post # 1,242) constitutes our "Laugh Of The Day"

Let me help you out, "Jeffy Pooh", "Hanksta" and "Madman".  There are many TYPES of HUMOR.  Copied and pasted hereinbelow is a complete list of all the various TYPES of HUMOR.  Which type or types of HUMOR have we employed in Post # 1,242?  See if you can guess!

Different Types of Verbal & Written Humor

Adviser:  the comic adviser gives uncalled for advice in a Punch prototype. Ex: Advice to people who want to buy a puppy: Don't.

Anecdotes:  any interesting event, either having to do with a celebrity or something smaller, that helps the humorist make a point. Anecdotes are great for the speaker and writer.

Aside:  a thought added as if something the speaker was saying reminded him of it.

Banter:  good-natured teasing back and forth; exchange of witty remarks.

Blendword:  blending two or three words to make a new word. Ex: smog for smoke and fog.

Blue Humor:  not appropriate for the public speaker. Humor based on easily offensive subjects like making love, body parts, and bodily functions.

Blunder:  wit based on a person who makes a mistake, which makes them appear foolish.

Bull:  a humorous statement that is based on an outrageous contradiction. Ex: "The best people have never had kids."

Burlesque:  a form of satire. Burlesque ridicules any basic style of speech or writing. (Parody makes fun of specific writings.)

Caricature:  exaggeration of a person’s mental, physical, or personality traits, in wisecrack form.

Catch Tale:  a funny story that messes up the reader or listener by implying an awful ending but then stopping with a small declaration.

Conundrum:  a word puzzle that can’t be solved because the answer is a pun. Ex: why do cows wear bells? Their horns don’t work.

Epigram:  clever, short saying about a general group. Mostly satire about mankind. Two types, wordplay and thought play.

Exaggerism:  an exaggerated witticism that overstates the features, defects, or the strangeness of someone or something.

Freudian Slip:  a funny statement which seems to just pop out, but which actually comes from the person’s subconscious thoughts.

Hyperbole:  extreme exaggeration.

Irony:  a leading part of humor. Irony is using words to express something completely different from the literal meaning. Usually, someone says the opposite of what they mean and the listener believes the opposite of what they said.
Joke:  short story ending with a funny climactic twist.

Nonsensism:  inclusive of the epigram and the wisecrack, it is any kind of funny nonsense in speaking form. Nonsensism includes all kinds of absurdity without realistic logic and makes a general observation of absurd reference.

Parody:  humorous version of any well-known writing. Ex: Weird Al Yankovic’s "Pretty Fly for a Rabbi".

Practical Joke:  a joke put into action. You hear an oral joke, sees a printed joke, and feel the practical joke. The trick is played on another person and the humor comes from what happens.

Recovery:  a combination of blunder and wit, where a person makes an error, and then saves himself with a fast correction.

Repartee:  includes clever replies and retorts. The most common form is the insult.

Satire:  wit that is critical humor. Satire is sarcasm that makes fun of something.

Situational Humor:  this is comedy that comes from your own life. No one in your audience will have heard it and it can get a group used to you. This type of humor is based on a humorous situation that you have experienced.

Switching:  a common form of switching is changing the main parts of the story, such as the setup or the punch line, and creating a new joke.

Understatement:  making something that is regular or large seem extremely smaller or less. Intentionally down- sizing a large object.

Wisecrack:  any clever remark about a particular person or thing. Wisecracks are quick wordplays about a person.

Wit:  humor, irony, sarcasm, satire, repartee. Wit is funny because of the sudden sharpness and quick perception. Wit can bite. Verbal wit is a type of humor known as Wordplay.

* References:  L. Audrieth, Anthony "The Art of Using Humor in Public Speaking" 1998.

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Letter To The Editor - Yosemite Sam Rips Into Daffy Duck

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1.242

A letter was received today from Yosemite Sam, one of our loyal FREE subscribers.  As a preamble to this particularly angry letter, Hermann Hearsay is posting the following Notice, Disclosure and Disclaimer:

Publisher's Notice/Full Disclosure:  Mr. Yosemite Sam has been a long-time FREE subscriber to Hermann Hearsay.  Mr. Daffy Duck, whom Yosemite Sam viciously criticizes, is also a FREE subscriber to Hermann Hearsay, albeit for a much shorter period of time.  Neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck have any ownership interest in Hermann Hearsay.  Furthermore, neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck have any current or past employment relationship with Hermann Hearsay.  And in addition to all of the foregoing disclosures, be advised that neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck are related in anyway to any members of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management or staff.  And if these disclosures were not enough, it should also be noted that neither Yosemite Sam nor Daffy Duck has ever purchased a lunch or an intoxicating adult beverage for any member of Hermann Hearsay ownership, management, or staff.  In other words, we here at Hermann Hearsay barely know these two characters.  It must be plainly understood that Yosemite Sam speaks entirely for himself in his "Letter to the Letter"

Disclaimer:  The views expressed in Hermann Hearsay "Letters to the Editor" and/or Hermann Hearsay forums or other reader comments are not necessarily those of the ownership, management and/or staff of HermannHearsay.blogspot.com.  However, we do have complete control over what we choose to publish.  Sometimes it is helpful in growing our readershop to publish sensational, salacious and scandalous articles and reports.  We cannot be held legally responsible for our editorial standards regardless of how low and sleazy they may be.  Our readers like to read this trash, so we publish it!

Posted hereinbelow is Yosemite Sam's letter.  BE WARNED, IT IS VERY GRAPHIC!

Dear Jimmy,

This letter is to inform you that you have an A-hole amidst your FREE subscriber membership base.  His name is Daffy Duck.  This damned duck is no good!  He has never been any good!  Just ask other Hermannites!  They will tell you that he is a dad-blamed, stinkin' varmint!
Daffy Duck

Be advised that this no-good-for-nothin', dirty, dastardly duck has done the following despicable things:
  1. He has dishonored and knocked up my young niece!
  2. He has crapped all over #2, #4 and #5 putting greens over at the Loutre Shore Country Club just before my foursome played through.
  3. He has passed a bad check to me when he bought a shotgun at my garage sale last year.
  4. He got drunk down at the Barrel Bar a few weekends ago and did the Duck Dance on their bar.
  5. He shed his filthy dirty black feathers all over my wife's full-length white fox fur coat at our company's Christmas party this year.
This dirty, dastardly duck is a real dickhead!  Please be advised that it would be wise to cancel his FREE subscription and publish a public service announcement advising all your readers to avoid having anything to do with the bastard!
Yosemite Sam

Yours truly,

Yosemite Sam
Hermann, MO

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Anatomy of a Good News Story

Published by Clark Kant, Contributing Writer and Investigative Blogger

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,240

Have you ever read a "news" story and found yourself asking questions that the "news" story failed to answer?  Yep, me too!

Every good "news" story should answer the following basic questions?

WHO?
DID WHAT?
WHEN?
WHERE?
WHEN?
HOW?
TO WHAT EXTENT?
WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OR IMPLICATIONS?
WHY SHOULD I, THE READER, CARE?

Any first year J-School student at Mizzou can recite this list, probably more completely than I have reproduced it here.

Why is it then that we see so many "news" stories written by so-called "news" reporters which fail to answer all these basic questions?

Perhaps the answer to this query may be found among the following reasons:
  1. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher is an imposter who was never fully trained or educated in the proper conduct of his craft.  He merely masquerades as a "news" reporter.
  2. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher values speed in publishing the story over accuracy and thoroughness of the story.  Rather than get the story right, he seeks to get the story out as fast as he can!  I've actually seen some "news" stories where the publisher "brags" about how many minutes it took between first hearing about the story and publishing the story.  When did good journalism become such a race to get the story (any story) out to the public at the risk of failing to get a complete story out to the public?
  3. The so-called "news" reporter or publisher values marketing, promotion and advertising more than he values accurate and professional "news" reporting.  His so-called "news" publication is really just a cheap advertising publication.  Self-promotion and the building of readership become the important objectives as opposed to publishing worthwhile, professionally written "news" stories.  Salacious and scandalous pieces attract readers and are easier to write than hard-hitting, time-consuming investigative reports on matters of true public interest.  The publication is so focused upon self-promotion and generation of advertising revenues that it ceases to be a quality "news" publication.
Your thoughts?

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Quote Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,240

Referring to Northern District Associate Commissioner Matt Penning and all of his supporters, so-called "The Posse", Hank Vonk angrily speaks out in a "Letter to the Editor" of CNL, a local online "news" website ..... 

"We're sick of ALL of you!!!"  ~ Hank Vonk, Owensville, MO (In 'Letter to the Editor' written 12/5/2010 and published by CNL on 12/6/2010)

Note from Hermann Hearsay:  The full context of Hank Vonk's angry "Letter to the Editor" was published by Jeff Noedel, CNL Publisher.  This letter was not "hidden" for viewing by PAID subscribers only, as are so many of Noedel's "news stories".  Furthermore, a lengthy disclaimer accompanies Hank Vonk's "Letter to the Letter".  While Noedel, as publisher, had every opportunity to censor or refrain from publishing the letter or alternatively "hide" it from the general public, he has chosen not to do so.  Instead he asks us to believe that he and CNL have no editorial or collateral interest in the libelous letter which he has published.  If you'd like to view the entire content of the letter, click on this link:  http://countynewslive.com/content/2010/dec/06/letter-editor-hank-vonk-owenvsille-mo

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)

Bible Verse Of The Day - Monday, 12/6/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  12/6/2010
Post:  1,239

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: – Ecclesiastes 3:1

We are a driven culture. It seems that we want to achieve everything by yesterday! Some people may say that this is a good thing, but it seems we are perpetually tired and lack the margin to enjoy life. Solomon shows us that this is not unique to our culture. To understand the season that we are in can help us say no to many good things that are not appropriate at that particular time. May God give us the wisdom of Solomon, who knew how to focus on the right things in the right season.

Today’s commentary by Dave Whitehead, Senior Pastor, GraceNYC.org

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation)