Friday, May 14, 2010

Thanks To 'Hermann NEWS' and 'New Haven NEWS ONLINE'!!!!!!


Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

All of us here at Hermann Hearsay want to give a BIG SHOUT OUT to Glenn Warnebold and Renee Simon over at Hermann NEWS and New Haven NEWS ONLINE!!!!

Previously we had posted a report on our website link reciprocity agreement with Hermann NEWS and New Haven NEWS ONLINE for which we are sincerely appreciative.  Now we want to thank Glenn, Renee and their IT staff for designing a really professional-looking banner ad and website link button for us on their website.  We couldn't be happier with the way they used our new logo to design a cool-looking banner ad.

We are providing a link to their website http://www.ngnn.com/ at the bottom of every article we post.  Unfortunately our IT guy (and custodian), Frank Furter, has not yet been able to figure out how to design cool banner ads.  As soon as Frank figures it out, we will reciprocate with a nice banner ad button for Hermann NEWS and New Haven NEWS ONLINE.  (I'm sorry to say that Frank ain't the sharpest knife in the drawer, so this might take us awhile!)

By the way, if you have not yet visited their site at http://www.ngnn.com/, you really should!  In our opinion, Hermann NEWS, New Haven NEWS ONLINE and The Hermann Advertiser-Courier represent the GOLD STANDARD in local news, sports and weather reporting.

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Photo Of The Day - Friday, 5/14/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

Chubb E. Buttocks
Hermann Hearsay FREE Subscriber # 001

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Quote Of The Day - Friday, 5/14/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"Genius is the ability to reduce the complicated to the simple."  ~ Unknown*

*From Panda Buffet fortune cookie

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Joke Of The Day - Friday, 5/14/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down."  ~ George Burns

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Thursday, May 13, 2010

Gasconade County Jail Poll

Pubished by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Not to be outdone by our competitors in the local news media, Hermann Hearsay announced today that it has contracted with the highly respected Pooh Research Center to conduct a county-wide survey on the question "Should Gasconade County build and operate its own jail or detention center?" 

By the way, we don't even understand why this question is being proferred, since the county doesn't seem to be able to afford pay raises for its employees, new vehicles for its employees, white rock for our its washed out roads nor money for maintenance and preservation of our stately old courthouse.  Is this another pie-in-the-sky idea being "floated" by Southern District Commissioner Jerry Lairmore?  Recall that Commissioner Lairmore was the one who originally floated the idea of increasing our sales tax 1/2 cents in order to begin chip and sealing all county roads.  And where are we on that one, Jerry?

Representatives of Pooh Research Center will be conducting their telephone survey on Friday, Saturday and Sunday.  We will publish the results of their survey (N = 1,000) next week.

Another unidentified online news outlet recently completed a survey on this very same question.  Their sample size was N = 111.  We will sample N = 1,000.  Their sampling approach was to ask for a response to a poll from the readers of their website.  This sampling approach is defective in that the only people sampled were people who just happen to read their website.  Additionally respondents were not qualified in any way whatsoever.  For example, were the respondents to their survey even Gasconade County registered voters?  Were the respondents "representative" of the entire county or do they represent a vary narrow community in the northern end of the county?  In our survey, the Pooh people will call out to randomly selected registered voters all throughout the county.  If they're not a registered voter in the county, they will not be allowed to participate in the poll.  Yes, we are taking this poll very seriously my friend!

Here at Hermann Hearsay, we will never be out-done, out-worked or out-polled by the competition!

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Hermann Hearsay's 'Name The Mascot Contest'


Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

We are searching for the perfect name for our 'Hermann Hearsay' mascot.  You can help us out.  Please comment with your favorite name choice from among those listed below:
  1. Hadley
  2. Hank
  3. Hans
  4. Harlan
  5. Harold
  6. Hearsay
  7. Hector
  8. Hee-Haw
  9. Herbert
  10. Herkimer
  11. Herman
  12. Hermie
  13. Hickey
  14. Hickory
  15. Horace
  16. Hubert
  17. Huey
The winner of our 'Name the Mascot Contest' will receive two free passes to A. E. Newman's Mid-Missouri Mule Rides, and will be featured prominently in an upcoming article.  You must be 18 years old to enter the contest.

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BREAKING NEWS - County Employees Chow Down On Matt Penning's Famous German Potato Salad


Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor


County employees are celebrating Employee Appreciation Day at the Gasconade County Courthouse today.  Our sources inside the courthouse tell us that Northern District Commissioner Matt Penning made up a large batch of his famous German potato salad for the luncheon festivities.  Aaaaaaah!  At times like this, I'm tempted to run for a county office.  Hmmmmm?  County Collector might be a nice job!

No information is available on what dishes Presiding Commissioner Ron Jost or Southern District Commissioner Jerry Lairmore prepared for the county employees.  If someone knows, please contact us so we can update our report.

For more information regarding Matt Penning's Famous (and Secret Recipe) German Potato Salad, go to our earlier report by clicking on the following link:

http://hermannhearsay.blogspot.com/2010/04/matt-pennings-german-potato-salad.html

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'Supreme Court Faces Mecca' by Ann Coulter

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Sometimes we just don't have enough local controversy to report on here in Hermann.  When those occasional lulls in the news cycle occur, you can always count on Hermann Hearsay to stir the pot in other ways. 

Today we are copying and pasting an article written by one of our favorites ladies.  In the interest of full and complete disclosure, we also like Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Newt Gingrich and Ronald Reagan.  Now, the mere mention of these names may cause a handful of you to cancel your FREE Subscriptions and leave us forever.  If you do decide to leave us, don't let the screen door hit you in the ass!

Yes, we're right-wing, neocon, Bible-thumpin', gun-totin' conservatives here at Hermann Hearsay.  If you linguine-wristed, liberal, pro-abortion Democratic Socialists don't like it here, go read www.CountyNewsLIVE.com instead.  Afterall, that's one site which could really use the additional readership.  Aren't they the ones who hold subscriber telethons to solicit PAID subscribers and bake sales to earn extra cash to pay their utility bills?

Supreme Court Faces Mecca

by Ann Coulter

Posted on World Net Daily
May 12, 2010

Americans can thank the Supreme Court for the attempted car bombing of Times Square, as well as any future terrorist attacks that might be less "amateurish" and which our commander in chief will be unable to "thwart" unless the bomb fizzles.

Over blistering dissents by Justices Antonin Scalia, Clarence Thomas, John Roberts and Samuel Alito, five Supreme Court justices have repeatedly voted to treat jihadists like turnstile jumpers. (Thanks, Justice Kennedy!)

That's worked so well that Obama's own attorney general is now talking about making massive exceptions to the Miranda warnings – exceptions that will apply to all criminal suspects, by the way – in order to deal with terrorists having to be read their rights as a bomb is about to go off.

Let's be clear: When Eric Holder thinks we're being too easy on terrorists, we are being too easy on terrorists.

Either the five liberal justices demanding constitutional rights for terrorists are out of their minds, or the religious worship of President Franklin D. Roosevelt has got to stop. According to liberal logic in the war on terrorism, FDR was a bloodthirsty war criminal.

When six Germans and two Americans were suspected of plotting an attack on U.S. munitions plants during World War II, FDR immediately ordered them arrested and tried in a secret military tribunal held behind closed doors at the Department of Justice.

Within weeks, all were found guilty. Six of the eight, including one U.S. citizen, were given the electric chair. One German was sentenced to life in prison and the other American citizen – who had turned himself in and revealed the plot to the FBI – got 30 years.

The Supreme Court upheld the secret trial, but didn't get around to writing the opinion until after Old Sparky had rendered its own verdict.

Consider that the eight saboteurs never actually did anything other than enter the country illegally, which I gather is considered a constitutional right these days (except in my future home state of Arizona).
Still, FDR had them executed or imprisoned after trial in a secret military tribunal.

How many future car bombers would be discouraged if Faisal Shahzad were tried by military tribunal and executed by, say, the end of the month? What if Army doctor Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan had already gotten the chair?

But we can't do that because, according to five Supreme Court justices who aren't "progressive" enough for American liberals, terrorists waging war on U.S. soil get full constitutional protections.

So, instead, we're left arguing about whether an exception should be made to Miranda rights in the case of a terrorist who plotted with foreign agents to plant a car bomb in Times Square. ("You have the right to remain violent ...")

We are at war. The Supreme Court has no right to stick its fat, unelected nose into the commander in chief's constitutional war powers, particularly in a war against savages whose only reason for not nuking us yet is that they don't have the technology. (The New York Times hasn't gotten around to printing it.)

The reason Democrats are obsessed with controlling the courts is that unelected judges issuing final edicts is the only way liberals can attain their insane policy agenda. No group of Americans outside of Nancy Pelosi's district would vote for politicians who enacted laws similar to the phony "constitutional rights" liberal justices proclaim from the Supreme Court.

President Obama would rather surrender his authority as commander in chief to the Supreme Court than get blamed for deciding to treat terrorists as if they're Paris Hilton facing a drunk driving charge. Let the court do it.

(Recall that Obama's decision to try Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, mastermind of the 9/11 attack, in a civilian court in New York was even less popular with the American people than Jay Leno at 10 p.m.)

Meanwhile, elected Democrats in Congress are also happy to yield their lawmaking authority to the court, so they don't have to be the ones voting for laws mandating late-term abortions; hard-core pornography on the Internet; government-sanctioned race discrimination; forced cross-district busing; confiscatory property-tax hikes to fund socially engineered school-desegregation plans; bans on the public observation of religious traditions shared by most Americans; free education, health care and welfare benefits for illegal immigrants; and a redefinition of the 2,000-year-old institution of marriage against the express wishes of voters in every state to vote on it.

(Note: This is only a partial list.)

The Supreme Court has become a Blue Ribbon Commission for Lunatics, issuing binding edicts in 5-4 votes that Americans would never in a million years vote for. Distinguishing between Elena Kagan and any other Democratic nominee is like distinguishing between Hannibal Lecter and Vlad the Impaler.

*************************************************************************************

Ann Coulter, well-known for her TV appearances as a political analyst, is an attorney and author.

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Photo Of The Day - Thursday, 5/13/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos


Elmer Fudd's horse, 'Gabby'

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Quote Of The Day - Thursday, 5/13/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"That the said Constitution shall never be construed to authorize Congress to infringe the just liberty of the press or the rights of conscience or to prevent the people of the United states who are peaceable citizens from keeping their own arms."  ~ Samuel Adams 

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Joke Of The Day - Thursday, 5/13/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"I can't do journalism anymore because, as it turns out, there are two things that will get you locked up in journalism. One is malice; the other is reckless disregard for the truth -- these are my hobbies."  ~ Rick Harris

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Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Matt Penning, Mike Jacquin and Dick Schaefer Were Right!

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Northern District Commissioner Matt Penning, citizens Mike Jacquin, Dick Schaefer and others have accused  Presiding Commissioner Ron Jost and Southern District Commissioner Jerry Lairmore of "dragging their feet" on the Gasconade County courthouse project.  They were right!

You might want to go back and read an old "Hermann Muenster"
posting dated 8/27/2009 ......

http://www.ngnn.com/65041/content/2009/aug/27/roundup-taxes-courthouse-expansion-discussed-county-commission-meeting

And now nearly nine (9) months later, a fair and reasonable person has to conclude that citizens Mike Jacquin and Dick Schaefer as well as Northern District Commissioner Matt Penning were onto something when they confronted Presiding Commissioner Ron Jost during a Commission Meeting for dragging his heels and intentionally obstructing progress on the county courthouse renovation and county office expansion project.

So Presiding Commissioner Jost, the citizens of Gasconade County still want to know ....
  1. "Where do you currently stand and what progress have you made with respect to planning the scope of and developing the funding for the renovation of the Gasconade County Courthouse and the expansion of county offices?" 
  2. "As the top leader of Gasconade County, Commissioner Jost, what have YOU personally done to move this project along?" 
  3. "Are you still WAITING for someone else to hand you the project scope, the project schedule, the project estimate and the project funding all neatly wrapped in a bow?" 
  4. "IF you are still WAITING on someone else, why in tarnations do We The People of Gasconade County, even need you?"
Aaaaaaah Commissioner Jost, the jig is finally up!  You will soon be replaced, and We The People will move on into the 21st Century without you!  And in 2012, you will be joined in the private sector by Southern District Commissioner Jerry Lairmore.

Jimmy Oldsun
NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor
http://www.hermannhearsay.blogspot.com/

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Photo Of The Day - Wednesday, 5/12/2010

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Clayton Moore's horse, 'Silver'

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Quote Of The Day - Wednesday, 5/12/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos


"Government does not solve problems; it subsidizes them."  ~ Ronald Reagan

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Joke Of The Day - Wednesday, 5/12/2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose."  ~ George Carlin

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Tuesday, May 11, 2010

The Streets And Sidewalks Of Hermann - Day Two Of A Five Day Engineering Field Survey

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

This investigative report is continued from Monday's report. 

Yes, I know that we could have hidden all of our reports subsequent to Monday's report for our Premium Subscribers only.  We could have done that to "bait" our FREE Subscribers into upgrading their memberships.  But we're just not sneaky enough and under-handed enough to pull something like that.  Therefore, all five (5) reports in this series of reports will be available to everyone, even our lowly cheapskate FREE Subscribers who have not yet upgraded their memberships.

On my second day of walking (Tuesday, 5/11), I found the following street and sidewalk conditions:
  1. Guttenberg Street heading north from 5th Street to Wharf Street. - Sidewalks on both sides of street in excellent conditon.  Concrete street surface in excellent condition. Street surface well sealed.  This section of street should be the Gold Standard for all streets in Hermann but particularly for the historic downtown district as well as all main thoroughfares and arterial streets.
  2. Wharf Street heading west from Guttenberg Street to Schiller Street - Sidewalk on south side of street.  Cracked and busted but surface is relatively level.  Asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored in a few spots.
  3. Schiller Street walking south from Wharf Street to 1st Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition.  Asphaltic street surface patched.
  4. Schiller Street walking south from 1st Street to 2nd Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition but busted in a few spots.  Asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  5. Schiller Street walking south from 2nd Street to 3rd Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition but busted in a few spots. Asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  6. Schiller Street walking south from 3rd Street to 4th Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition for the most part but busted in a few spots on the east side and very uneven in front of Back Home Again.  The new sidewalk in front of the German School Museum is wonderful.  This should be the Gold Standard for sidewalks in the downtown area.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  7. Schiller Street walking south from 4th Street to 5th Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition, but sidewalk on east side near the Cat Nip Inn are very uneven and DANGEROUS.
    More on this subject tomorrow.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  8. 5th Street walking west from Guttenberg Street to Schiller Street - Sidewalk (north side of 5th Street) at the amphitheatre is in very good condition.  But the sidewalk from there to the corner of  5th and Schiller is pathetic and DANGEROUS.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  9. 5th Street walking west from Schiller Street to Market Street - Sidewalks on both sides of street in fair condition although surfaces are busted up and irregular in spots.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  10. 5th Street walking west from Market Street to Mozart Street - Sidewalk in fair to good condition on south side of street.  Sidewalk on north side of street in very poor condition.  Surface in varying states of repair with a few steps in the pathway.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  11. Mozart Street walking south from 5th Street to 6th Street - Sidewalk on west site is in fair to good condition.  Sidewalk on east side exists from alley to 6th Street and is in poor condition.  The walking surface is very irregular and DANGEROUS as concrete slabs have heaved and settled at different rates.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  12. Mozart Street walking south from 6th Street to Dead End 7th Street - West sidewalk is in excellent condition.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  13. Mozart Street walking south from Dead End 7th Street to 8th Street - No sidewalks. The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.  This section of street is often flooded and this is hard on the street surface.
  14. Mozart Street walking south from 8th Street to 9th Street - No sidewalks.  Mozart Street walking south from 6th Street to Dead End 7th Street - West sidewalk is in excellent condition.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.  One pothole in need of filling.
  15. Mozart Street walking around City Ballpark - No sidewalks.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored. A few potholes in need of filling.
  16. Gasconade Street walking south from ballpark levee to 12th Street - No sidewalks.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
  17. Gasconade Street walking south from 12th Street to Hwy. 100 - No sidewalks.  The asphaltic street surface is patched, cracked and alligatored.
More survey results tomorrow.
 
Jimmy Oldsun
NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor
http://www.hermannhearsay.blogspot.com/

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Job Hunt

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

This story appeared in 'Berger Baloney With Mayo' at http://www.bergerbaloneywithmayo.blogspot.com/.  It was written by my boss Clark Kant, CEO of TTTNN and Editor of 'Berger Baloney With Mayo'.  Clark has had a colorful past!


Job Hunt by Clark Kant


My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned.  Couldn't concentrate.
    Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
    After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
    Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting. 
    Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
    Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it... couldn't cut the mustard.
    My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
    I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
    Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
    I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
    Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
    So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
    After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.
    My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.
    SO, I TRIED Retirement AND FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE Job!!!!!!!
So what job are you perfect for?

Jimmy Oldsun
NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor
www.hermannhearsay.blogspot.com

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Quote Of The Day - Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Published by Lois Lame, Subscriber Services, Lifestyles Reporting, and Cool YouTube Music Videos

"Give people a fact or an idea and you enlighten their minds; tell them a story and you touch their souls."

~Hasidic Proverb

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