Friday, April 16, 2010

Jimmy Oldsun Promoted and Given Additional Responsibilities

Published by Clark Kant, Publisher and Editor In Chief

I am pleased to announce that Truman T. Tiger and I have decided to promote Jimmy Oldsun to Editor of 'Hermann Hearsay'.  Jimmy will retain his current responsibilities as Night Desk Reporter, Investigative Reporter, Sports Reporter, Weather Reporter, and Ambulance/Fire Truck Chaser.  Jimmy will take on the responsibilities of Editor along with his current duties.  I will be spending more time on the start-up of 'Berger Baloney With Mayo'.

Jimmy's new full title is:  Hermann Hearsay Night Desk Reporter, Investigative Reporter, Sports Reporter, Weather Reporter, Ambulance/Fire Truck Chaser and Editor.

Jimmy is quite pleased.  He has definitely earned the promotion.  In order to fit his new title onto his business cards, we have abbeviated his title to "NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor".

Unfortunately, we will not be able to give Jimmy a pay raise at this particular time.  But we are starting a 401(k) retirement savings account for Jimmy, Lois, Frank and myself.  Truman T. Tiger has agreed to fund the 401(k) accounts with TTTNN common stock.  The stock is not publicly traded and the share price is undetermined.  But we are "betting on the come" that one day in the future, we will all be multi-millionaires.  At least, that's what Mr. Tiger has led us all to believe.

Please congratulate Jimmy when you get the chance!

Clark Kant
Publisher and Editor In Chief
www.BergerBaloneyWithMayo.blogspot.com
www.HermannHearsay.blogspot.com
www.HermannHookups.blogspot.com

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5 comments:

  1. Hang in there Clark, Jimmy, Lois and Frank! Remember Sam Walton's first employees and how wealthy they eventually became with their Wal-Mart stock! It can happen for you guys too!

    A. E. Newman
    Bland, MO

    ReplyDelete
  2. Henrietta HornschwagelApril 16, 2010 at 9:24 AM

    Can you guys at least pay Jimmy some gas mileage now? I know for a fact that his Corvette sucks a lot of gas! Sometimes Jimmy hesitates to chase ambulances and fire trucks because his 'Vette burns so much gas!

    Henrietta

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thurston Howell IIIApril 16, 2010 at 9:25 AM

    Congrats to Jimmy!

    Thurston Howell III

    ReplyDelete
  4. Clark,

    I've just been informed by our resident psychiatrist, Dr. I. B. Nutts, that the dosage on your prescription is wrong. Please have your pharmacist call our office immediately.

    Dr. Nutts has a slight case of dyslexia, and it seems he transposed a couple numbers when writing out the dosage for your prescription.

    We regret this mistake.

    Nurse Ratched, R.N.

    ReplyDelete