Saturday, January 15, 2011

An American Holiday Sometime In The Future

Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Reporter; and Aspiring Photo-Journalist

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,478

A glimpse of the future as seen through the mind's eye of a cynical but compassionate conservative whose blog has not yet been shut down by the Federal Bureau of Civil Political Discourse (FBCPD) .....


"Winston, come into the dining room, it's time to eat," Julia yelled to her husband.

"In a minute, honey, it's a tie score," he answered. Actually Winston wasn't very interested in the traditional holiday football game between Detroit and Washington . Ever since the government passed the Civility in Sports Statute of 2017, outlawing tackle football for its "unseemly violence" and the "bad example it sets for the rest of the world," Winston was far less of a football fan than he used to be. Two-hand touch wasn't nearly as exciting.

Yet it wasn't the game that Winston was uninterested in. It was more the thought of eating another TofuTurkey. Even though it was the best type of VeggieMeat available after the government revised the American Anti-Obesity Act of 2018, adding fowl to the list of federally-forbidden foods, (which already included potatoes, cranberry sauce and mince-meat pie), it wasn't anything like real turkey. And ever since the government officially changed the name of "Thanksgiving Day" to "A National Day of Atonement" in 2020 to officially acknowledge the Pilgrims' historically brutal treatment of Native Americans, the holiday had lost a lot of its luster.

Eating in the dining room was also a bit daunting. The unearthly gleam of government-mandated fluorescent light bulbs made the TofuTurkey look even weirder than it actually was, and the room was always cold. Ever since Congress passed the Power Conservation Act of 2016, mandating all thermostats - which were monitored and controlled by the electric company - be kept at 68 degrees, every room on the north side of the house was barely tolerable throughout the entire winter.

Still, it was good getting together with family. Or at least most of the family. Winston missed his mother, who passed on in October, when she had used up her legal allotment of life-saving medical treatment. He had had many heated conversations with the Regional Health Consortium, spawned when the private insurance market finally went bankrupt, and everyone was forced into the government health care program. And though he demanded she be kept on her treatment, it was a futile effort. "The RHC's resources are limited," explained the government bureaucrat Winston spoke with on the phone. "Your mother received all the benefits to which she was entitled. I'm sorry for your loss."

Ed couldn't make it either. He had forgotten to plug in his electric car last night, the only kind available after the Anti-Fossil Fuel Bill of 2021 outlawed the use of the combustion engines - for everyone but government officials. The fifty mile round trip was about ten miles too far, and Ed didn't want to spend a frosty night on the road somewhere between here and there.

Thankfully, Winston's brother, John, and his wife were flying in. Winston made sure that the dining room chairs had extra cushions for the occasion. No one complained more than John about the pain of sitting down so soon after the government-mandated cavity searches at airports, which severely aggravated his hemorrhoids. Ever since a terrorist successfully smuggled a cavity bomb onto a jetliner, the TSA told Americans the added "inconvenience" was an "absolute necessity" in order to stay "one step ahead of the terrorists." Winston's own body had grown accustomed to such probing ever since the government expanded their scope to just about anywhere a crowd gathered, via Anti-Profiling Act of 2022. That law made it a crime to single out any group or individual for "unequal scrutiny," even when probable cause was involved. Thus, cavity searches at malls, train stations, bus depots, etc., etc., had become almost routine. Almost.

The Supreme Court is reviewing the statute, but most Americans expect a Court composed of six progressives and three conservatives to leave the law intact. "A living Constitution is extremely flexible," said the Court's eldest member, Elena Kagan . "Europe has had laws like this one for years. We should learn from their example," she added.

Winston's thoughts turned to his own children. He got along fairly well with his 12-year-old daughter, Brittany, mostly because she ignored him. Winston had long ago surrendered to the idea that she could text anyone at any time, even during Atonement Dinner. Their only real confrontation had occurred when he limited her to 50,000 texts a month, explaining that was all he could afford. She whined for a week, but got over it.

His 16-year-old son, Jason, was another matter altogether. Perhaps it was the constant bombarding he got in public school that global warming, the bird flu , terrorism or any of a number of other calamities were "just around the corner," but Jason had developed a kind of nihilistic attitude that ranged between simmering surliness and outright hostility. It didn't help that Jason had reported his father to the police for smoking a cigarette in the house, an act made criminal by the Smoking Control Statute of 2018, which outlawed smoking anywhere within 500 feet of another human being.

Winston paid the $5000 fine, which might have been considered excessive before the American dollar became virtually worthless as a result of QE13. The latest round of quantitative easing the federal government initiated was, once again, to "spur economic growth." This time they promised to push unemployment below its years-long rate of 18%, but Winston was not particularly hopeful.

Yet the family had a lot for which to be thankful, Winston thought, before remembering it was a Day of Atonement . At least he had his memories. He felt a twinge of sadness when he realized his children would never know what life was like in the Good Old Days, long before government promises to make life "fair for everyone" realized their full potential. Winston, like so many of his fellow Americans, never realized how much things could change when they didn't happen all at once, but little by little, so people could get used to them.  The gradual creep of socialism had been almost imperceptible, such that the majority of the American people, most of whom were struggling to avoid foreclosure, keep their jobs and pay their monthly bills, never realized it was occurring.

He wondered what might have happened if the public had stood up while there was still time, maybe back around 2010, when all the real nonsense began.  Before the government crackdown on FREE SPEECH, the Tea Party, citizen participation at townhall meetings and 'Congress On The Corner' events in the wake of the January, 2011 tragic shooting in Tucson, AZ of a Congresswoman, a Federal Judge, and a 9 year-old girl among others he could no longer remember.  "Maybe we wouldn't be where we are today if we'd just said 'enough is enough' when we had the chance," he thought.  "If we had just spoken out back when we were still free to petition the government for redress of our grievances and freely express our political dissent," he thought.

Maybe so, Winston. Maybe so.

Winston recalled the Civility In Public Discourse Act of 2011 which was enacted by Congress and signed into law by President Barack Obama just three short months after the tragic mass shooting in Tucson.   "I think that's where we really started going astray," he thought.  "After that people were afraid to speak up in city council meetings, school board meetings, county commission meetings, townhall meetings and the like." he thought.  "We were really concerned that speaking out against misguided public policy would lead to an investigation of our political backgrounds, our political affiliations, our motives and our intentions.  No one wanted to be placed on a list of political malcontents and/or on a list of potential political terrorists," he thought.  "We all had home mortgages and car loans to pay, and we had our children to raise.  None of us could afford to be incarcerated for our expressions of political dissent.  So we just dumbed down and kept our mouths shut," he thought.  "Maybe we should have spoken out when they first started talking about the regulation of political discourse after that Tucson shooting," he thought.

Maybe so, Winston.  Maybe so.

Tee-Shirts Distrubuted At Tucson Memorial Event

NOTE TO READERS:  This essay was inspired by an email I recently received from a friend in Colorado, 
the national news and political "analysis" which has unfolded in the aftermath of the shooting in Tucson on January 8th, as well as a report posted just today by Poor Richard 2011 on his news blog at
www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com.


Reciprocal Links:  http://www.AccuWeather.com (Weather Reports and Forecasts), http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com  (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)


Hermann Hearsay Staff Tired

Published by Jimmy Oldsun, NDRIRSRWRAFTC & Editor

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,476

Our staff is very, very tired!  They've been working very hard to bring you the very best in local news coverage and inside stories our competitors are not covering.  Because they are so weary, I've decided to give them the rest of the day and evening off to watch the Mizzou (12) vs. Texas A&M (13) basketball game, the Ravens vs. Steelers and the Packers vs. Falcons NFL playoff games.

I am very, very tired as well!  Perhaps I shall take a nap!  Or maybe I'll have some of Frank's strong coffee or maybe a Verve Energy Drink!

In the meantime, you can read a lot of good articles over at www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com while we are taking some time off.  Poor Richard never gets tired, and he never sleeps!  He's like Matt Drudge in that regard!  Another guy who never gets tired is Don Kruse over at The Hermann Advertiser-Courier.  Ol' Don is probably down at his office right now writing up articles for next week's paper.  And if not, it's a good bet that he's watching the Mizzou game too!

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.AccuWeather.com (Weather Reports and Forecasts), http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)


Song Of The Day - Saturday, 1/15/2011

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,475

Karen and Richard Carpenter perform one of their hit songs, "Rainy Days and Mondays" .....



Reciprocal Links:  http://www.accuweather.com/ (Weather Reports and Forecasts), http://www.dschaefer.vemma.com/ (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.heart2heartlyrics.blogspot.com/ (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.hermannmonews.blogspot.com/ (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.rivertownrecipes.blogspot.com/ (Great Local Recipes),

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.hermannadvertisercourier.com/ (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.mutigers.com/ (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.time4pie.com/ (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.toedtmanngrosse.com/ (Obituaries), http://www.watkinsonline.com/ (Watkins Natural Products)

Photo Of The Day - Saturday, 1/15/2011

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date: 1/15/2011
Post:  1,474

When someone (an elected Gasconade County official for example) calls you a "JACKASS", this is what he means .....

Definition of JACKASS
(Merriam-Webster)

1: donkey; especially : a male donkey
2: a stupid person : fool

See jackass defined for English-language learners »

Example use of JACKASS:

"Some jackass spilled his drink on me."

First Known Use of JACKASS:
1727

Related to JACKASS

Synonyms: berk [British], booby, charlie (also charley) [British], cuckoo,
ding-a-ling, dingbat, ding-dong, dipstick, doofus [slang], featherhead,
git [British], goose, half-wit, fool, lunatic, mooncalf, nincompoop, ninny,
ninnyhammer, nit [chiefly British], nitwit, nut, nutcase, simp, simpleton,
turkey, yo-yo

Antonyms: brain, genius


Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)

Reciprocal Linkshttp://www.AccuWeather.com (Weather Reports and Forecasts), http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes),

Laugh Of The Day - Saturday, 1/15/2010

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,473

"Police are looking for a man in Phoenix who robbed a bank and told the teller he wanted the money in twenties, forties and sixties. Authorities believe he could be one of President Obama's economic advisers."  ~ Jay Leno (1/11/2011)

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.accuweather/ (Weather Reports and Forecasts), http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes),

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)

Quote Of The Day - Saturday, 1/15/2011

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,472

"In November of 2012, the good citizens of the Southern District of Gasconade County (some of whom are no doubt presently 
unemployed through no fault of their own) will have the opportunity to decide whether or not they want to retain in office their current arrogant, unprofessional, condescending, do-nothing and foul-mouthed representative on the Gasconade County Commission.  I recommend they send this individual back into the ranks of the private sector where he belongs!"  ~ A. E. Newman, Candidate for Southern District Associate Commissioner of Gasconade County, 1/15/2011 (Statement made at informal breakfast gathering of Owensville citizens at the Owensville McDonald's.)

It looks like the race for Southern District Associate Commissioner is really heating up.  A. E. Newman went on to inform the small gathering of Owensville residents about recent condescending remarks made by incumbent Southern District Associate Commissioner Jerry Lairmore in reference to the unemployed of Gasconade County and a citizen activist who resides in Gasconade County.  Newman told the group that Lairmore had spoken of the county's unemployed  in a recent county commission meeting, calling them lazy and in many cases unqualified to receive unemployment benefits.  He blamed the unemployed rather than his lack of effort and effectiveness for the county's inability to attract job producing industry to our county.  Newman said "He's good at pointing the finger of blame to others rather than accepting responsibility himself!"  Newman also told the group about an incident which occurred after last week's commission meeting.  According to Newman, Commissioner Lairmore referred to a regular citizen attendee, who had by then left the commission chambers, as a "jackass".  Folks, that is what you are called by your elected representative if you regularly attend weekly public meetings of the county commission and happen to disagree from time to time with decisions and actions of the county commission.  Newman continued "Let me ask you, do you want your elected representative on the county commission to look down his nose at you, or do you want him to listen to your concerns and ideas?  Friends, you will have the opportunity to express your choice at the ballot box in November of 2012!"

Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes)

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.AccuWeather.com (Weather Reports and Weather Forecasts), http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)

Bible Verse Of The Day - Saturday, 1/15/2011

Published by Lois Lame, SALRCYTMVDQJCP & Assistant Editor

Date:  1/15/2011
Post:  1,471

Because God wanted to make the unchanging nature of his purpose very clear to the heirs of what was promised, he confirmed it with an oath. God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope offered to us may be greatly encouraged. – Hebrews 6:17-18

When God made His promises to mankind, He did so by making an oath not to us, but to Himself. Why? The Bible chronicles our constant unfaithfulness in contrast to His unchanging love. God is not looking at our abilities to keep this agreement, but His own. We couldn’t deliver ourselves, so He came as a man to deliver us. God is the initiator and the guarantor of this agreement. This should give us great hope! God has promised to be our God and hear our prayers through Jesus Christ. This is not based upon you, but upon Jesus. Run to Him today.

Today’s commentary by Dave Whitehead, Senior Pastor, GraceNYC.org


Reciprocal Links:  http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes),

Other Recommended Links:  http://www.AccuWeather.com (Weather Reports and Forecasts),
http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com (Watkins Natural Products)