Published by Dick Schaefer, Award-winning, Unpaid, Part-time Contributing Writer; Amateur Investigative Reporter; and Aspiring Photo-Journalist
Date: 1/2/2011
Post: 1,394
Legend has it that there was once a hill farmer (and part-time moonshiner and winemaker) who lived around these parts up on top of hill which was surrounded by thick woods. The farmer raised a few chickens, fed a milk cow and tended to his vegetable garden. He had an old bluetick coonhound that was good at treein' coons and squirrels. The farmer called his coonhound "Ol' Blue".
There were a couple of mean old rattlesnakes that lived in a rock den down at a nearby creek branch. Now these rattlesnakes had a nasty habit of crawling up to the farmers cabin to eat mice, of which there were
always plenty. One rattlesnake was 6 ft. long, and his name was "Liar", because he was so deceitful. The other rattlesnake was barely 4-1/2 ft. long. His name was "Pompous", because he was so arrogant.
Now Ol' Blue didn't like or trust these two rattlesnakes one darned bit. Ol' Blue would get to howlin' somethin' fierce when the rattlesnakes slithered up to the cabin or got anywhere near it. Sometimes Ol' Blue would howl at night and keep the farmer from sleepin'. And sometimes Ol' Blue would bark and howl at the rattlesnakes during the daytime. Alas, all of this infernal barkin' and howlin' finally got on the farmer's nerves, and one day after getting no sleep at all the night before, the farmer took out his 12 ga. double-barrel shotgun and, wihout thinking about the consequence of his actions, shot Ol' Blue dead.
Several weeks later, the farmer ran out of his primary source of red meat, coon and squirrel. A few weeks later he got tired of eatin' nothin' but chicken and garden vegetables. The farmer realized that he had made a big mistake by shootin' Ol' Blue.
Then one warm moonlit night in July, the farmer was startled from a deep sleep when he realized that those two rattlesnakes had slithered into his cabin and had gotten into bed with him. The rattlesnakes were disturbed by the farmer waking up, and they gave warning by shaking their rattles in unison.
The rattlesnake named Liar said to the farmer ... "We have eaten all of your mice, and now we plan to eat your chickens!"
"You can't eat my chickens! What will I have left to eat?" the farmer responded.
"We don't care one damned bit what you have left to eat!" the other rattlesnake named Pompous hissed. "Eat the vegetables in your garden!"
The farmer thought for few seconds, and he remembered that his double-barrel shotgun was propped up near the door. The problem was that the gun was not loaded. As it happened, there was a box of 12 ga. shells on his nightstand. He would have to slowly reach for a couple shells. The rattlesnakes did not seem to notice when he reached into the box of shotgun shells. The farmer decided that he would bolt for his gun, load two shells, and try to shoot the rattlesnakes before they could strike at him. Well, to make a long story short, the farmer barely made it out of his bed before the two rattlesnakes struck out at him.
A few months later, a couple turkey hunters happened upon the farmer's cabin. The chickens had been eaten by the rattlesnakes. The vegetable garden was grown over in weeds. And the milk cow was skin and bones. The farmer was found on his cabin floor. He was gripping two 12 ga. shotgun shells in his hand and his double-barrel shotgun was still propped up near to the door. The farmer had not been able to get off a shot!
Moral of the story: 'If you have a dog that barks or howls at snakes, shoot the damned snakes
rather than your dog!"
Reciprocal Links: http://www.DSchaefer.Vemma.com (Nutrition For A Lifetime), http://www.Heart2HeartLyrics.blogspot.com (Song Lyrics Seeking Singer-Songwriters), http://www.HermannMoNews.blogspot.com (The 'Drudge Report' of Hermann), http://www.RivertownRecipes.blogspot.com (Great Local Recipes), http://www.WatkinsOnline.com/richardhschaefer (Watkins Natural Products)
Other Recommended Links: http://www.HermannAdvertiserCourier.com (Gasconade County's Newspaper of Record), http://www.MUTigers.com (Official Website of the Missouri Tigers), http://www.Time4Pie.com (Great Pie, Coffee & Conversation), http://www.ToedtmannGrosse.com (Obituaries)
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Ol' Blue and the Rattlesnakes
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